—— dare I pronounce
  the divine words？—— that she loves me！
  That she loves me ！ How the idea exalts me in my own eyes！ And，
  as you can understand my feelings ， I may say to you ， how I honour
  myself since she loves me ！
  Is this presumption ， or is it a consciousness of the truth？ I do
  not know a man able to supplant me in the heart of Charlotte； and yet
  when she speaks of her betrothed with so much warmth and affection， I
  feel like the soldier who has been stripped of his honours and titles ，
  and deprived of his sword.
  JULY 16. How my heart beats when by accident I touch her finger ，
  or my feet meet hers under the table！ I draw back as if from a furnace
  ； but a secret force impels me forward again ， and my senses become
  disordered. Her innocent， unconscious heart never knows what agony these
  little familiarities inflict upon me. Sometimes when we are talking she
  Iays her hand upon mine ， and in the eagerness of conversation comes
  closer to me， and her balmy breath reaches my lips ，—— when I feel
  as if lightning had struck me ， and that I could sink into the earth.
  And yet ， Wilhelm， with all this heavenly confidence，—— if I know
  myself， and should ever dare —— you understand me. No， no ！ my heart
  is not so corrupt ， it is weak ， weak enough but is not that a degree
  of corruption ？
  She is to me a sacred being. All passion is still in her presence
  ： I cannot express my sensations when I am near her. I feel as if my
  soul beat in every nerve of my body. There is a melody which she plays
  on the piano with angelic skill ，—— so simple is it， and yet so spiritual！
  It is her favourite air ； and， when she plays the first note， all pain，
  care， and sorrow disappear from me in a moment.
  I believe every word that is said of the magic of ancient music. How
  her simple song enchants me ！ Sometimes， when I am ready to commit suicide，
  she sings that air； and instantly the gloom and madness which hung over
  me are dispersed， and I breathe freely again.
  JULY 18. Wilhelm， what is the world to our hearts without love ？
  What is a magic-lantern without light ？ You have but to kindle the flame
  within， and the brightest figures shine on the white wall； and， if
  love only show us fleeting shadows， we are yet happy ， when ， like
  mere children ， we behold them ， and are transported with the splendid
  phantoms. I have not been able to see Charlotte to-day. I was prevented
  by company from which I could not disengage myself. What was to be done？
  I sent my servant to her house， that I might at least see somebody to-day
  who had been near her. Oh ， the impatience with which I waited for his
  return！ the joy with which I welcomed him！ I should certainly have caught
  him in my arms， and kissed him ， if I had not been ashamed.
  It is said that the Bonona stone， when placed in the sun ， attracts
  the rays， and for a time appears luminous in the dark. So was it with
  me and this servant. The idea that Charlotte's eyes had dwelt on his countenance，
  his cheek ， his very apparel ， endeared them all inestimably to me，
  so that at the moment I would not have parted from him for a thousand
  crowns. His presence made me so happy ！ Beware of laughing at me ， Wilhelm.
  Can that be a delusion which makes us happy ？
  JULY 19. "I shall see her today ！" I exclaim with delight， when
  I rise in the morning ， and look out with gladness of heart at the bright，
  beautiful sun. "I shall see her today ！" And then I have no further wish
  to form ： all， all is included in that one thought.
  JULY 2O. I cannot assent to your proposal that I should accompany
  the ambassador to _______. I do not love subordination； and we all know
  that he is a rough， disagreeable person to be connected with. You say
  my mother wishes me to be employed. I could not help laughing at that.
  Am I not sufficiently employed？